Chapter 12: Of Prophecies and Practicing

Welcome back to our irregularly scheduled nonsense!

Last time, Kelsey and Kishan escaped to India, leaving Ren in the hands of Lokesh to be tortured in order to find Kelsey's whereabouts and the location of the other pieces of the Matt Damon Amulet (which are in the possession of Mr. Kadam and Kelsey).  Instead of immediately trying to figure out where Lokesh is keeping Ren (seriously, they don't even talk about this as an option despite the fact that Ren just got kidnapped), Kelsey listens to Mr. Kadam exposit about Ren's parents, and she learns some Kendo for...some reason.

That pretty much continues in this chapter.  They talk about the prophecy some more, and Kelsey trains a bit more.  Because that's what I want to read right after an exciting action sequence where one of the major characters was taken by the villain and whose life is in mortal danger.  Training sequences.

We also get to hear some actual worldbuilding about how the universe of Tiger's Curse works!  It's really bad!

Chapter Twelve: Of Prophecies and Practicing

Just from the name of the chapter, you would be correct in assuming that this is filler.  It's filler.  This whole book has been filler.

The last chapter ended with Kelsey telling us that she dreamed about Ren.  This chapter picks up with describing her dream.  I'm not sure why this was broken up, other than I guess Houck realized that nothing was happening, and the most exciting thing to include as a cliffhanger was our main character falling asleep.

Anyway.

It was the same horrible dream I'd had before.

This makes it sound like it's a recurring nightmare that she's been having.  As far as I can tell, she had this dream once in the last book.  It's like how in Star Wars, Anakin had one dream about Padme dying, and then this alone turned him evil.  (Alright, I'm oversimplifying, but still.)

Ren is tied up with a guy in a robe standing over him.

It was Lokesh.

Thanks, I never would have guessed.

Lokesh gets a knife and stabs Ren in the heart.  Kelsey tries the wrestle the knife away, but she is a weak woman and can't do it.  Ren starts dying.

Ren whispered to me, "Kelsey, run!  Get out of here!  I'm doing this for you!"

But I couldn't run.  I couldn't do anything to save him.  I could only crumple to the floor, knowing life without Ren was meaningless.

That's a great role model, there!  Life without a boy is completely meaningless, so it's pointless to try to even save yourself if he sacrifices himself for you.  Ouch.

The dream changes, and now Ren's a tiger with cuts all over him.  He changes into a human and tells her that if he escapes, Lokesh will be able to find her.  Um, how?  I know this is a dream, but it's one of those Prophetic Visions that are kind of actually happening.  So, how would Ren escaping lead Lokesh to Kelsey, exactly?  Don't worry about it.  It's for Drama.

He kissed me briefly.  "Go!"  He thrust me away from himself and disappeared.

I turned in circles, calling out for him.  "Ren?  Ren!"

Even in her dreams, Kelsey is completely useless.

The dream changes again, and now Ren is healthy and laughing with his arm around a "pretty girl."  Kelsey tries to get his attention but he ignores her.

He walked away with the girl and pushed me aside as if I was just some useless obstacle.

You know, I could make a joke about Kelsey being a useless obstacle that keeps the plot from happening, but I am above that.

I started crying.

I have no idea why, but the way this is phrased is just really funny to me.

A bird starts singing outside of her window, and Kelsey wakes up not feeling rested.

I'd dreamed of Ren all night, captured, a prisoner.

Um, Houck?  We know. WE JUST READ ABOUT KELSEY DREAMING ALL NIGHT ABOUT REN BEING A PRISONER.  It happened on the last page!  We don't need a summary of something we literally just read.

Kelsey thinks about how short a time she'd had with Ren--about two months in total--and that she's sad.

And yet . . . he was here.  My parents were here too.  I could feel them so close I could almost touch them sometimes.

I literally can't remember the last time Kelsey thought about her parents.  It makes sense in Harry Potter when Harry has this same realization, because Harry constantly thinks about his parents and what his life would have been like if they were alive, and almost every adult character he speaks to knew his parents and constantly tells him about how similar he is.  Kelsey hasn't earned this, because she hardly ever thinks about them.

I was so overcome by Ren's capture that I couldn't even begin to process my Thor-like power.

OOF.  Kelsey's power literally comes from Durga.  Why are we bringing in Norse mythology?

Kelsey heads downstairs and runs into Mr. Kadam, who brings her into the study to work on the prophecy.  Kishan is there as a tiger, and Kelsey promises to make him some cookies later.  Because that's what's important right now!  Cookies!

Anyway.  Mr. Kadam has finished translating the prophecy (finally), so we get to see the whole thing together!  I'm going to do the same thing as last time--I'll transcribe the whole thing here, and we'll see if the whole thing ends up happening.  Because I'm still not convinced the first one did.

Seek her gifts before all else,

For Durga's blessing waits anew.

The place of gods begins your quest

'Neath Noe's glacial mountain blue.

Let Ocean Teacher 'noint your eyes;

Unfold the hoary sacred scrolls.

Teach arrant wisdom and advise

Gates of spirit he controls.

Paradise awaits; remain steadfast

And find the navel stone

Which leads you to the heart of all

Ancient history's leafy throne.

Atop the world-tree is your airy prize

Grasp bow and arrow, let fly true.

Discus routs and chief's disguise

Can stave off those who would pursue.

Four houses shall your spirit test

Of birds, bats, gourds, and siren's nest.

And last of all look to the sky

As iron guardians round you fly.

India's masses shall be robed

And rise in strength across the globe.

I took some liberties in arranging it into stanzas to make it easier to read, because in the book it's one double-spaced stanza and takes up like an entire page.

For some of my more mythologically-inclined readers, you may notice that this bodes very poorly.  I know I've spoiled what some of this means on my Tumblr, but for those who haven't seen my mental breakdown there, buckle up.  It's about to get weird in a few chapters.

Kelsey says that the first couple of lines are obvious--they have to go get Durga's blessing again.  This is not impressive, nor deserving of the word "pondered," because it literally says, "For Durga's blessing waits anew."  Kelsey is an idiot.

Mr. Kadam says that he's already marked all of Durga's temples in the country and surrounding areas on the map, which narrows down where they'll need to start out.

"Kishan, please remind me to wear my bell anklet."

Why does Kelsey need to be reminded?  Ren literally gave it to her to use at the next temple, and she already knows she needs a bell.  Kelsey is an idiot.

Kelsey is sad again about taking so long to date Ren, and distracts herself from that by going back to the prophecy.  Mr. Kadam says that "Noe's glacial mountain" refers to the Himalayas, and Kelsey asks why he thinks that.  I mean, it's the big mountain range in Asia, Kelsey, it's not that far of a stretch.

"Noe is short for Noah."

"As in Noah's ark?"

"Yes."

I--

What???

The same Noah from the Old Testament??  You know, in the Bible??? The thing that has nothing to do with Hinduism, which is what this series is about??????

"Umm, wasn't Noah's ark supposed to have landed on Mount Ararat?"

"You have a good memory.  That's what I thought at first, but Mount Ararat is in modern Turkey, not India.  The location of the ark has been hotly debated regardless."

SLOW DOWN, you've just learned that Noah was an actual historical figure who existed in this universe!  There has been no sign of any other religions existing yet, since everything has come from Hinduism/Buddhism, which makes sense because those are religions that historically came from India!  What is happening.  Maybe it's just poetic language.

Kelsey asks why Mr. Kadam narrowed it down to the Himalayas, and he says it's because he doesn't think the prophecy wouldn't take them too far off of the Indian subcontinent.  Um, why not?  You've just learned that Judaism/Christianity also exists at the same time as the Hindu gods, apparently, so what's stopping the prophecy from taking you elsewhere?

(Fun fact, the stupid prophecy doesn't even take them to somewhere in India.  It's in Tibet!!)

Also, hey, how would the person who wrote the prophecy know about Noah anyway?  It's written in an ancient Indian language, and I'm not sure if it would be likely that some pre-birth-of-Christ Buddhist/Hindu priest would know about the Jewish story of the flood.  This is dumb.

Mr. Kadam also says that it's the Himalayas because the story of Noah involves a flood.  Get ready for the mother of all ass-pulls:

"The Bible story is not the only one that describes a great flood.  In fact, many dozens of cultures have stories of a great flood that covered Earth.  I researched and cross-referenced all of the flood myths.  There's Deucalion and Pyrrha of Greece, the epic flood story of Gilgamesh, Tapi of the Aztecs, and so on.  One similarity among all of them is that, when the rains abated, the people were led to dry ground.

"In India, there is a myth that Manu saved the life of a fish who, in turn, told him the flood was coming.  He built a boat, and the fish pulled him to the mountains.  Several locations have been suggested as a landing site, but I omitted many of them for not being 'of glacial mountain blue.' . . ."

So, let me follow Mr. Kadam's train of logic here.  Noe --> Noah, with no explanation as to why it's written as Noe when it's the same number of syllables and would still scan in the poem.  Noah -> great flood -> lots of versions of the great flood -> Hindu myth of the great flood -> Himalayas.

You know what would be a simpler way of getting there without referencing a myth that doesn't fit into the timeline and doesn't fit in with the setting?  You change "Noe's mountain" to "Manu's mountain."  That way you remove like 6 unnecessary steps that don't make sense in your train of logic.

Unless they actually mean that Noah's ark is a literal thing that exists, as opposed to a shorthand way for Kelsey to understand what the eff is going on.

But that would be ridiculous.

Yeah, so they narrow the specific mountain down to...Mount Everest.  Because it "touches the sky" and birds are a thing in the prophecy, and there's an "airy prize."  Kelsey asks if she and Kishan will have to climb Everest.

"No, no.  Climbing Everest is something only a brave handful of people have ever done."

Thousands of people have climbed Mount Everest, and enough people are climbing annually that people have died while trying to avoid crowds. This simply isn't true.

Anyway, no, they don't have to climb all the way up, because that would be exciting.  They're looking for a town at the base to find the teacher mentioned in the prophecy.  He says that he hasn't been able to figure out which city it is yet, and he's hoping that Kelsey can help him out.

He hands her a list of cities, and all of them are crossed out except one.

The one site on the map not crossed off was north of Everest and written in Chinese.

Kelsey asks what that city is, and Mr. Kadam says that it's Lhasa, in Tibet.  Kelsey says that the teacher might live in Tibet, while the item they're looking for could be in India.  This revelation shocks Mr. Kadam with its brilliance.  He picks up a book and flips through it while muttering to himself.

He slammed the book shut and grabbed me in a brief hug, eyes twinkling.  "That's it!  You've done it, Miss Kelsey!"

"What did I do?"

"Lhasa is the city ''neath Noe's mountain'!  Its name translated means 'city of the gods'!"

Now, I'm gonna be real here.  Kelsey contributed nothing to this revelation?  She was given a list, compiled by Mr. Kadam, all but one of which was crossed off.  There was one that wasn't crossed off, which  Mr. Kadam knows about because he created the list, and that was because it was still in the running for the solution.  Kelsey says, "Hey, maybe this one is the solution?"  Kelsey has contributed nothing.

So, yeah, they're going to Tibet.  Mr. Kadam says that the Ocean Teacher is likely a Lama, and possibly even the Dalai Lama.  And what do we know about Mr. Kadam's predictions?  They're usually wrong!  So it's not the Dalai Lama.

They immediately say that it isn't the Dalai Lama, because he's currently living in exile in India.  So, since they have to go to Lhasa, the Ocean Teacher isn't the Dalai Lama.  This is what editing is for, people.  So your characters don't immediately contradict themselves between lines of dialogue.

So, the Ocean Teacher will anoint their eyes, read from sacred scrolls, and possibly show them the way to the spirit gates.  Kelsey asks what spirit gates are, because having our protagonist know things is lame, so we have to exposit some more.

"Spirit gates mark entryways into shrines in Japan."

So why are we going to Tibet to find a Japanese gate that comes from Shinto?  Because Shut Up.

Ah, yes.  Tibet.

Kelsey asks if there are any spirit gates in Tibet, and Mr. Kadam says that he's not sure, and it's possible that the prophecy refers to something else.  Gee, that was a dumb aside, Mr. Kadam.

Kelsey asks what a navel stone is.  Mr. Kadam says that it's probably talking about an omphalos stone, which represented the center of the world and could be found in the Mediterranean, most notably at the Oracle of Delphi.

Ah, yes.  Tibet.

I'm about to lose my god-damned mind.  Why are we talking about Japan?  Why are we talking about Greece?  What does any of this have to do with Mount Everest, or the Himalayas, or the Indian curse that we're trying to break?

Mr. Kadam says that the omphalos stone was used by the Oracle of Delphi to take fat bong rips of the gas seeping through the floor of the temple to get super high and have visions.

"There's also a stone in Thailand, one in the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem, and one is the foundation stone for the Jewish temple in the Dome of the Rock."

Someone please tell me what is happening.

Apparently, the omphalos stone in Greek mythology represents the rock that Rhea fed to Cronus to protect Zeus.  The Holy Sepulchre does actually use an omphalos stone, because in Judeo-Christian mythology, the stone represents the center of the world, i.e., the place in Jerusalem where God resided.  There is actually a stone in Thailand, as well, apparently.

None of this explains why we're talking about it, because it has nothing to do with Indian or Tibetan culture from what I can tell.  Unless all the other stuff is also true, which makes no sense given what we've already read.  Right?

"What does it look like?"

"It's shaped somewhat like an egg standing on end with a hole on the top and carved webbing along the outside."

Don't mind this picture of the omphalos stone at Delphi that looks nothing like what Mr. Kadam just described.

"So we find this omphalos stone and sniff its fumes or hold it, and it will show us to a world tree?"

"Correct."

Kelsey just wants to get high.

Then, Kelsey asks about the world tree.  Gee, this conversation sure is riveting.  Kelsey is just asking, "What is X?"  And then we get an explanation of X.

Mr. Kadam says that the world tree is a common thing in many cultures.  There's a Hindu story about a wish-fulfilling tree that flourishes when humanity is doing well and dies when humanity isn't.

Except it's too late, Mr. Kadam!  You already linked the world tree myth with the Golden Fruit!  Just because Houck doesn't remember these things doesn't mean I don't!

Mr. Kadam namedrops the Norse Yggdrasil, the Slavic/Finnish oak tree, the Hindu fig tree (THEN WHAT WAS UP WITH YOUR OTHER HINDU REFERENCES, MR. KADAM?), the Tree of Life, and mentions Korea, Mesoamerica, Mongolia, Lithuania, Siberia, Hungary, and Greece.

Woof.  Yes, it's true that lots of cultures have a "world tree" mythological archetype.  Why is this relevant, though?  Seriously--what is the point of name-dropping all of this?  It's confusing, because it has nothing to do with how we've seen the world work so far, and it does nothing but say "there's a lot."  I might excuse this if there was an attempt to say that all cultures have developed their mythology from the one that exists in real life, but there's none of that!  That would be interesting, and therefore hard to write, so we don't get anything!

Incidentally, all of these references are ripped almost directly from Wikipedia.

Kelsey asks if they're supposed to eat the fruit, and Mr. Kadam says that not all of them have fruit.  Pointless.

"There is a test associated with most of them.  Some even mention a giant serpent at the base."

Well, only Norse mythology that I know of (Nidhoggr), unless he's talking about the dragon guarding the Golden Fleece in Greek mythology, which isn't a world tree.  Or, like, Satan.

"Hey guys, can I tempt you with a cameo in a crappy YA paranormal romance book?"

Kelsey asks if there's anything like the Kappa waiting.  Mr. Kadam says that he hopes not, and that the tests here are more likely going to be mental tests, rather than physical tests like the Kappa.  He is wrong about this, not only because I know what happens later, but because the prophecy itself mentions "iron guardians" that you have to fight with a bow and arrow.  Mr. Kadam is an idiot.

Kelsey asks if the "India's masses shall be robed" line refers to clothes.  Mr. Kadam says that it could stand for royalty.  He is incorrect.  It's clothes.  Spoilers.

They say that hopefully Durga is fine with Kishan going along instead of Ren.  Mr. Kadam says that they should go right away, because after they get the second MacGuffin, it's likely that Kelsey will get sucked into another vision of Lokesh, and since Ren is nearby, they might be able to figure out where Ren is being kept.

....

Huh, that's actually kind of smart.  One point.

Or, you know, Mr. Kadam can use his vast fortune and numerous connections to find Lokesh.  Minus one point.

Kishan says that he'll go with Kelsey (I'm not sure why this is an issue, since she kind of has to go with a tiger as per Durga's instructions from the last book, but whatever).  With that settled, and with a destination in mind, Kelsey goes to train some more.

Yippee.

Kishan teaches Kelsey some throws, and she does a good job, natch.  When she turns to leave, he grabs her from behind and picks her up, fireman carrying her up the stairs.  He says to be careful because an attacker can come from anywhere.  Comedy?

Kelsey says that she's tired from working out with Kishan, and Mr. Kadam suggests she practice using her lightning powers instead.

"Okay, I'll try.  I just hope I don't end up zapping you."

"Yes.  Do try to avoid that."

Comedy?

Scene break!  Mr. Kadam leads Kelsey out to a clearing in the jungle where a lot of archery targets are set up.  Oh, great, another training scene.

Mr. Kadam says that since she was able to zap people before because she was angry about Ren getting captured, she should try to feel the same feelings in order to use her amazing lightning powers.  Guhh.

She pictures the scene in her head, and of course it works perfectly on her first try, because Kelsey is the textbook definition of a Canon Mary Sue.  She ends up obliterating the entire target.  Because she's Perfect.

Kelsey is weirded out because it wasn't that intense when she used it on a person.  Mr. Kadam says, essentially, "Screw it, go for distance!"  So she does.  She hits them both exactly as hard as before.  Mr. Kadam gets Kishan to set up some other targets even farther away and closer to each other to see if she can hit both.

"I'd like you to try to expand your range to encompass all three targets.  Try to imagine something large, like an elephant or a dinosaur, and you have to hit the whole length of it."

What a bizarre couple of examples.

She tries, and only hits one, so the next time she moves her hand and lets the electricity arc between the targets.  Mr. Kadam thinks that this is an "interesting adaptation."  Is this Houck not being able to write human dialogue, or are we supposed to think that Kelsey is mutating before our eyes?  You decide!

He tells her to try again.

"Try again.  This time, focus on widening it.  Close your eyes for a moment and envision a Chinese fan.  You hold the edge, and, as it leaves your hand, spread it out in front of you so the blast spreads like a fan's edge."

Why specifically a Chinese fan?  Does the country of origin affect the blast radius of the lightning power?

Kelsey tells him to stand behind her, and shoots off some more lightning.  This time it moves slower, but...

This time it worked . . . too well.  

Comedy?

She obliterates all of the targets set up and a good portion of the surrounding area, forcing Kishan to drop to the ground to not get zapped.

I hollered out, "Sorry!"

He waved that he was alright.

I'll admit, I smiled.  But that's mostly because it reminds me of a bit in The Adventure Zone where Merle jumps off a moving train and fucks up a dice roll and when everyone asks if he's alright he just gives a thumbs up from the side of the tracks.

(I think.  Been a while since I've listened to Murder on the Rockport Limited.)

Mr. Kadam is happy with her immediate progress, and says that they'll keep working to get the intensity down to levels that won't blow everything up.

He laughed.  "Yes.  It's all about control.  I have high hopes that you will be able to master this, Miss Kelsey."

Quick question, how does Mr. Kadam know this?  It's not his power.  It's Kelsey's.  I'm just saying that it would be a bit more impactful if Kelsey was the one with these realizations, since as it is here she just seems like she's along for the ride rather than an active character.  And that's just not fun to read.

Anyway.  Mr. Kadam says that he wants her to keep practicing her wonderful new lightning powers.

"I will work with you tomorrow on focusing your power levels."

Incredible.  This is literally turning into a Shounen anime.

Kelsey thanks Mr. Kadam.  Scene break!

But before I go on, I'd like to talk a bit about the dreaded training scene.  These tend to be a weird mixed bag.  If they're well-written, they can provide a surprising amount of characterization for our protagonists.  How do they react to being pushed to their limits?  How do they feel when they fail at something?  If they're written well, they can really let us see the hard work our protagonists put into succeeding, so that when they finally do, it feels earned.  They can also let us see the magic system of a fantasy story, if the protagonist has to learn how it works along with the reader.

Training scenes can also be, um, very not good.  If they're not well-written, they are at best filler, since the protagonist doesn't struggle and we therefore don't get to see them work hard; they are at worst boring, especially if the protagonist instantly succeeds.  Negative bonus points for if we learn nothing about how the magic system works in a fantasy story.

I've avoided doing this until now, because I like to try to come up with my own analysis when I can, but in this case Limyaael's rants on training scenes already cover most of the bases.  Basically, your protagonist shouldn't be automatically The Best.  But I like to use examples, so I'll do that.

So.  Good training scenes are relatively more rare than mediocre or bad training scenes, but when they're good, they accomplish more than just "protagonist levels up and gets a new skill."  Luke's training in Episode V is a good example of the hero learning a new skill in a scene that's still teaches us about the protagonist and the world we're in.  His training with Yoda isn't just so that he can get cool new powers--it's a pivotal moment of character growth.  We see his immaturity when he gives up trying to lift his ship out of the swamp; we see his fears when he fights that weird Darth Vader monster (seriously, what is up with that scene), which makes him relatable; we see a different side of the Force from Yoda in that it isn't something to be used solely to achieve a certain goal, which is what we'd seen from Obi Wan and Darth Vader before; and we see Luke's decision to cut his training short, with the possible consequences of never being able to master the Force, to save his friends.  'S good.

Another recent example is from Into the Spiderverse, which, I'll be honest, is an extended training scene broken up by Plot, since Miles has to learn how to be Spider-Man from the other Spider-Men while saving the day from the bad guys.  But a lot of first-appearance superhero movies are just long training sequences, so I think it still counts.  This movie is great for a lot of reasons, but Miles's transformation from a kid who's just imitating Peter Parker into a fully-realized Miles Morales Spider-Man is the central push of the movie.  He learns how to bring his own unique experiences and character into the role of Spider-Man, and it's very satisfying to watch because we got to experience the transformation alongside him and see him overcome his struggles.  'S also good.

Or, heck, Prisoner of Azkaban does this really well, too!  Harry goes to Lupin so he can learn how to cast a Patronus charm.  He isn't immediately successful, and when he's just barely able to produce some mist, Lupin is impressed and tells him that it's a good start.  It's an incredibly difficult spell, and while Harry has some natural talent for DADA, it still takes him until the climax of the book to produce a real Patronus.  But even then, he practices pretty regularly until then, so it doesn't feel like it comes out of nowhere.  But the real thematic point of the Patronus is about Harry's relationship with his idea of family--he learns the spell from his father's old school friend, who until that point is about the closest character he's had to a father figure (forgetting Hagrid, but honestly, the series also likes to forget about Hagrid being a central father figure in his life), and he's finally able to produce a corporeal Patronus because 1) he believes that he can go live with Sirius and have a real family, and 2) he realizes that the guy he thought was his father was himself (which is dripping with symbolism).

Now let's look at some bad training scenes.  In Eragon, Eragon learns how to use a sword in about a couple of months.  He does get his ass handed to him when he first starts, but soon after is able to fight basically any bad guy with no problem.  He's too good at magic, and regularly exhausts himself by doing things that are too impressive for a beginner (the only real mistake he makes in magic is when he blesses the girl whose name I forget, but that really doesn't affect the plot in a major way).  He literally gets a magical upgrade in Eldest from the weird Elf twins whose names I also forget.  But still, there's an attempt to show him learning how to do things, and even though it happens too quickly, it still happens.

In Breaking Dawn, Bella turns into a vampire.  New vampires in Twilight have trouble adjusting to their new life, and usually go into a bloodlust for a good while after changing.  Not drinking human blood requires intense effort that they have to learn, and even the Cullens, who have been vegetarians for a while, struggle with this (notably Jasper).  But Bella is just able to resist this impulse for Reasons.  I think it has something to do with her innate Vampire Powers, but she doesn't have to work for those, either.  It's boring and dumb.

So, how does Tiger's Quest do training scenes?  Let's completely ignore the fact that most of Kelsey's training thus far in martial arts/swords doesn't actually come into play later.  Kelsey does a bunch of wushu and training with both Ren and Kishan.  We don't really hear a lot about what she learns, but we do know that she's awesome at it.  Whenever she fails at something, it's not a way to get inside of her head and see how she deals with it, it's an excuse for Ren to be violently over-protective.  She's great at takedowns despite only learning martial arts for a couple of months.  The first time she uses her magical lightning powers voluntarily, she can do it almost perfectly, and the only thing that's wrong is that she just has to refine the intensity of the blasts.  We don't learn anything about her, and it's honestly still really unclear about how this lightning power works.  She feels angry about Ren getting captured, but Kelsey doesn't seem to be a particularly angry person.  Is this power linked to her own personality, or is it literally a part of Durga, meaning that Kelsey is becoming more like her?

No idea!  Lightning powers, away!  Zap!!!

It's dumb.

Woof, that little tangent got a bit longer than I thought it was going to get.  Oh, well.

Anyway.  We skip over the next couple of weeks of training, which means that Kelsey can just summarize what she learns how to do instead of describing the process, because that's difficult to write.  Mr. Kadam makes excuses to WOU and Kelsey's professors about her not being there, and they just let her finish the semester online.  Mr. Kadam also says that Ren will not be finishing the term because he had a family emergency back in India.

The dean seemed very understanding and willing to do anything he could to help.

This seems very unlikely, given my experiences with student affairs offices.  Although, given that Mr. Kadam probably gave them more money than they know what to do with, this is probably pretty likely.  Don't want to piss off your big donors, after all.  Gotta love bribery!

Kishan teaches Kelsey how to use various weapons and do hand-to-hand combat.  We don't get to hear what this actually entails.  I just thought I'd pass the information along.

Kelsey also practices her dumb lightning powers, and she's Amazing at it:

I was now able to control the level so I didn't destroy my targets.  I could shoot a black hole through the bulls-eye like an arrow.  Or, I could hit them all at the same time and knock them over.  I could totally obliterate all or just the one I chose.

That's all we get!  She's mastered her lightning powers already, in literally the same chapter the training starts and it's just summarized.  Christmas.  Also, I'm not sure that's what a black hole is.

It was very empowering but also very scary.  I could be a superhero or a bad guy, and I really didn't want to be either one.  All I really wanted was to help Ren and Kishan break the curse . . . and to be with Ren.

Oof.  Glad to see our character's sole motivation is Boy.  What a great role model!

Kelsey also dreams about Ren almost every night, and they're basically the same as what we read before--he's trapped and he always tells her to leave.  One night, after a "Ren nightmare," Kelsey can't get to sleep and heads out to her veranda.  Kishan is already out there as a tiger.  Wait, isn't the veranda only attached to her room, as per the last book?  How did he get there?  Through her room?

Whatever.  Kishan says that it's easier to watch over Kelsey from the veranda (so, he definitely went out there through her room).  Now, I'd get on Ren's case for this, but Kishan has an actual reason!  He feels guilty that Ren got captured, and feels like it's his fault, so he's trying to keep the same thing from happening to Kelsey.  He says it probably would have been better if he'd never gone to America, and says, "I never learn."

Kelsey, oblivious, asks what he means, because her brain is broken due to repeated concussions.  Of course he's talking about Yesubai, dummy!  Kishan exposits that every decision he's made has made things worse for everyone--going behind Ren's back to get together with Yesubai caused them to get cursed, and caused Yesubai's death.

Why is it that Kishan is the only character with consistent characterization?  His flaws are actually flaws (even though they're as shallow as "wants what he can't have") and he actually...acknowledges them and feels bad about them?

Kelsey comforts him by saying that Yesubai really loved him.

"I bet that even if she knew her life would be cut short, she'd most likely go through it all over again."

How does Kelsey know this?  She knows almost nothing about Yesubai except for what Ren and Kishan have told her, and given the whole "nicknames are for lower social classes" thing she sounds kind of awful.

Kishan responds that he can't be absolutely certain that she did--they didn't spend all that much time together, and it's entirely possible that she was a pawn for Lokesh the entire time.  I begrudgingly award one point for Kishan pointing out something smart, and then immediately take it back because the whole point of his not knowing if they were really in love is so Kishan can be set up as a love interest!  As Kelsey's potential love interest, Kishan can't have been in a previous relationship, because that means his love for Kelsey isn't pure!

I hate it.

Kelsey disagrees with his analysis, and says that she gave up her life trying to save the two of them from Lokesh.  Kelsey also says that she doesn't see how she could have resisted Kishan anyway, because he's hot.  And that the only way she could have rebuffed Ren's advances was if she was in love with Kishan.  Because Yesubai, owner of two X chromosomes, can only resist Ren's hotness beam if she's already in a committed relationship.  I can't make this stuff up.

Also, there was a whole section in the first book that explained Yesubai couldn't stand Ren!  Just because you forgot, Houck, doesn't mean I did!

"It's not your fault these things happened.  Lokesh is the one who did these things, not you."

God, what is it with authors refusing to let characters bear the responsibility of their bad choices?  Characters can make mistakes, and learn from them.  To be fair, Kishan says that he made a bad choice in making a deal with Lokesh, but Kelsey absolves him of guilt by saying he did it because he fell in love, and "falling in love is not a bad choice."  This is not good enough.

Kishan still disagrees, which honestly makes me like him, because he seems to be resisting Houck's attempts to un-characterize him.  He still says that it was a mistake to trust Lokesh at all, which is fine.  Kelsey quotes her mom and says that it's okay to make mistakes as long as you learn from them.  Kishan says that he still hasn't learned, and Kelsey isn't sure what he means.

She's not smart.

They talk around it for like a whole page, with Kelsey asking him if he's dated anyone since she left for school, until Kishan says, "And it seems that the only girls I'm ever interested in . . . always belong to Ren."

Ignoring the gross "belong" part, Kelsey is shocked, shocked I tell you!

I looked at his back surprised [sic].

Oh, hey, a typo!  That's missing a comma.

Even though it was obvious to literally everyone, and she and Ren have had multiple conversations about this, she's shocked that Kishan loves her!  Oh, the drama!

I stammered, "Are you serious?"

"Yes.  I'm serious.  I'm a fairly candid, straightforward kind of guy.  I don't joke about this sort of thing."

"I have to spell out my character traits for the audience because it's harder to show it instead of just telling you in dialogue."

Anyway, Kishan says that Kelsey is just as pretty as Yesubai was, and he feels bad about this happening for a second time.  So he says that this time Ren wins, and Kishan won't interfere.

Kelsey notices that Kishan is different without Ren around, and that he "let his vulnerability show and didn't try to cover it with arrogance and bluster," i.e., the things that make him a fun character.

His heartfelt words affected me deeply.  It saddened me.

Yeah, we just get bland narration after Kishan bared his soul to Kelsey.  Kelsey is not a fun character to hear the thoughts of, since anything not involving Ren goes so far away from purple prose that it turns anti-purple.  Like beige, but SuperBeige.

Kelsey hugs him and thinks about how her mom told her to be honest about her feelings.

I said, "Well, Kishan, for the record, if Ren wasn't around, I'd date you in a heartbeat."

Which is not helpful, considering this is basically just telling him he's your second choice. And HELLO, REN ISN'T AROUND RIGHT NOW, BECAUSE HE'S BEEN KIDNAPPED.

Kelsey thanks him for getting Ren to go back to Oregon, and Kishan says that if Ren hadn't gone, he would have, and they'd probably be having a very different conversation right now.

"Can we be friends?"

"I was always your friend."

Why is it that when Kishan pines after Kelsey instead of Ren, I don't mind as much?  Ren seems awful and pushy, but Kishan seems to actually be able to interact on a personal level with Kelsey instead of just Raging Male Hormones.

This is probably just me rooting for the jilted love triangle love interest, though.

Kelsey gets up to go back to bed.

I turned at the door.  "And don't worry.  Your feelings are probably just temporary.  I'm sure the more you get to know me, the more annoying I'll become.  I have a grouchy side you haven't seen yet."

CAN CONFIRM.  The more I read about Kelsey, the more annoying she gets.

Kelsey goes back to sleep, and doesn't have anymore nightmares.  Whew, the chapter's finally over.

Closing Thoughts

Wow, this one got pretty long!

The prophecy seems to draw on a lot of non-Hindu and non-Buddhist mythology, and at this point it's unclear how much that'll play into the actual curse.  It could just be because Houck has no idea what she's doing, and is trying to make the prophecy more approachable for a Western audience to understand.  Or maybe she's just pulling stuff out of everywhere she can, because she can't figure out how to make the incredibly rich and layered religion of Hinduism apply to her novel without just making stuff up.

Ha.  Just wait.

Next time, Chapter Thirteen: Vatsala Durga Temple!  Durga shows up again, and Godwin's law is invoked.